Surprise! I’m alive and kicking you weakly in the shins!
My holidays were aiight. I hope your holidays were full of amazing sauce. The stxx hid in the closet all Christmas season ‘cus I had this power-trip thing going on and decided I was going to make them a bit neurotic. They miss you a lot and don’t regret leaving that closet.
So my mom got me these NAIL ART things from Japan, because she’s a darling and because people get the biggest urges to buy weird shit in Japan. They’re all 3D by the way, and we can all blame James Cameron for that.
I painted my nails after dinner so I could procrastinate digesting, and halfway through painting the middle finger of my left hand I decided I ought to use these James Cameron nail stickers. My brains envisioned a glorious evening of decorating my nails and then running down to show my mom, after which we would bond over her flattery of my nail artistry.
I used the flower ones. I agonized over where to place them on each nail, and was highly satisfied with the result.
It wasn’t until everything was dry and I decided to type this post, that I CRINGED awful badly when I peripheral visioned my nail art typing away at my keyboard.
It looked like- *retch warning* – little PUSTULES had grown on my nails. It was so disgusting I couldn’t even keep them on long enough for a picture, let alone run into the next room to gross out my sibling.
So instead of a beautiful, heartwarming article about how I wish all of you well and some bullshit about the weather, I end up typing this abomination about PUSTULES.
I’ll be back soon, in a less moronic fashion.
For now though – this nail polish remover smells like a party I need to crash.
As strong as 1 Shakeweight
one