I found this on ABOUT.COM

Tools to Help You Gain Weight
Use these tips and tools to help gain weight:

* Start with this Calorie and Nutrition Guide to find out how many calories you will need to reach the weight you desire.
* Use a food diary to track your calorie intake to be sure you are getting all of the calories and foods that you need.
* You can also use an online program such as Calorie Count Plus to track your calorie intake, your exercise and your changes in weight. Calorie Count Plus has a large data base of nutrition information for almost any food you like to eat.
* Add healthy calories to breakfast with an extra slice of whole-grain toast and peanut butter.
* Mid-morning and afternoon snacks should be nutritious, not junk. Trail mixes contain healthy nuts, dried fruits and can add healthy calories to your diet.
* Don’t add calories to your meals by choosing unhealthy fried foods such as french fries, chicken nuggets and fish sticks. Choose healthy foods such as baked potatoes, baked chicken and fish, just make your portions a bit bigger.
* Keep your meals balanced. One meal should have a healthy protein source such as fish, low fat meat, chicken or legumes plus two or three servings of vegetables. Green vegetables add lots of vitamins and phytonutrients while starchy potatoes and corn add extra calories.
* Drink healthy beverages such as milk and fruit juices to add calories. Don’t choose sugary sodas, which only add calories and no nutrition.
* Design a weight training program with help from About.com’s exercise site and our weight training site.

wow, weight-gain fail. i’m not sposed to eat junk??? or drink soda or fruit juices?? and you want me to replace all the goodness of taiwanese friend foods with POTATOES AND CORN?!?! what is this propaganda!??!?? the only thing i’m doing right is ‘start a food diary’.

I weigh about nothing pounds, and haven’t gained the slightest bit of weight since grade nine – thats if you don’t count the 2 pound fluxuation that happens after I eat and after I digest. So in order to fit into this halloween’s costume of the required SEXY RANDOM OCCUPATION, I’ve decided to gain weight.*

I’m going to picture and document EVERY SINGLE THING I EAT in pictures, until Halloween. And after I report my failure success in gaining a few pounds, I will continue this until Christmas. By Christmas time I will be One Sexy Beast.

[pause to subdue gag reflex]

I didn’t decide to do this until an hour ago. I was sitting there eating my 2nd dinner-

- when I wondered, where the heck is all this food going?!??! SRRSLY?!?!

*disclaimer: this is probably the eleventy thousandth time i’ve tried to do this, and nothing’s happened, but if at first you dont succeed, dust yourself off and try again dust yourself off and try again until it gets really dumb and then you stop cus seriously it gets really dumb. last time, until next time.